Monday 13th October  13:43 pm Good Afternoon

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Nelson's Column January February Sales 20th January 2006 Record-breaking bargains all over town this winter I rather overdid the spending round Christmas this year, so I've not had the chance to restock my wardrobe quite as thoroughly as usual in January. But my goodness haven't the sales been impressive? There have always been bargains to be had up and down Oxford Street if you’re willing to brave the crush, but in general I find the whole experience so depressing - baa-ing my way round Liberty’s with all the other sheep, frantically snatching at labels - that I have to comfort myself by buying something pointlessly expensive. Which renders the whole exercise futile. I want to do my shopping somewhere with a bit more class, frankly, but most years, if a gorgeous little boutique in Bond Street or Floral Street has a discreet sign saying 'sale', it means that their tops are down to only £78.50 from their normal £80. This year, however, the whole of Seven Dials, Soho and Mayfair is so covered in giant 70% DISCOUNT signs that they look like whole streets of Mr Byrite stores (albeit Mr Byrites with a funky hip-hop soundtrack and androgynous Japanese shop assistants wearing vomit-coloured Converse boots). And they really mean it too. Even on my severely limited budget, I managed four beautiful pairs of shoes in a single afternoon trip to Neal Street, with still enough left over for a serious accessory binge. I mentioned this to a rather serious friend who works for the Daily Telegraph, and she suggested that this was a sign of economic downturn – we're apparently now so far in debt that we simply can’t afford to step out of high street saints Primark and Top Shop to buy ourselves an occasional £300 handbag. The boutiques are having to offer us serious sales just to get rid of all their stock. Well, more power to the economic downturn, I say. Apparently we’ll still be seeing these offers and better well into February, and that means that I'm going to be looking fabulous. Assuming my next credit card bill doesn’t leave me homeless and destitute. All donations are gratefully received. Tour de Londres London is to host the start, the ‘Grand Depart’, of the 2007 Tour de France. The route, which will form the first stage of the race, will be unveiled at the Queen Elizabeth II Conference Centre on 9th February 2006. Eddie Er-fine Formula 1 star, Eddie Irvine, runs the risk of being arrested on sight if police catch a glimpse of him in the capital. The former Ferrari and Jaguar driver still has a warrant out for his arrest dating back to 2003 when he failed to appear in court for speeding on a motor scooter without a license or valid insurance. Moore's Legend Set in Stone The first images of the statue of Bobby Moore set to adorn the new Wembley Stadium have been released. The bronze 20ft Philip Jackson statue will be unveiled in its entirety later this year to mark the 40th anniversary of England’s 1966 World Cup win. September 2008 23rd September Chips too Chavvy for Chelsea 16th September The London Restaurant Awards August 2008 26th August No Smoking, No Ducks, No Barbecues 20th August The Olympics July 2008 24th July Sandwiched Out 17th July The Show Ain't Over 'Til the Fat Lady's on Page 3 June 2008 26th June Love All at Wimbledon 16th June Miller Puts the Heat on Tennant May 2008 27th May Booze Banned on Buses 20th May Same Again? April 2008 23rd April By George 11th April Back to the 80s March 2008 28th March How do You Solve A Problem Like Medea? 20th March Flight Fantastic February 2008 20th February Dark, Satanic Turnmills 6th February A Diamond in the Drink January 2008 21st January People Wanted for Plinth 14th January Boo! Hiss! December 2007 28th December Tate That - A Hirst for Art 20th December Christmas Shopping November 2007 27th November Mind the Gap 26th November London On A Tray October 2007 26th October Leaving the Station 14th October The Sky's the Limit September 2007 26th September The Play Within A Play 19th September Fashion, Frocks and Celeb Shocks 12th September Saying Tanks for the Mammaries August 2007 24th August Heathrow under Siege 17th August Gormless 10th August Losing Face July 2007 24th July Are We Reaching Boiling Point Yet This Summer? 13th July Red Ken versus Blonde Boris June 2007 22nd June Last Orders at the Fag Machine 11th June London the Musical May 2007 21st May What Lurks Beneath 10th May The Stuff Dreams Are Made Of April 2007 27th April London’s Walk on the Wild Side 20th April Stand Behind the Yellow Line 13th April Like Water for Chocolate March 2007 23rd March So, Another Magazine 16th March Avoiding iContact February 2007 23rd February Sex and Art... 16th February C-Charge Protest Fails to Bring Down Government 9th February Live Earth London January 2007 26th January A Vote for Shilpa is a Vote for Britain 18th January Carriage on up the West End December 2006 29th December Food for Thought 22nd December A Poisonous Marketing Campaign 15th December In for a Penny, In for Five Pounds November 2006 17th November Big Department Stores Leave Santa Out in the Cold 10th November Failing to Save the World October 2006 27th October Frozen Prawns and Melting Icecaps 20th October Predatory Pelicans and Happy Woodland Folk 13th October Hope at last for east end of Oxford Street September 2006 16th September Lite the Blue Paper and Stand Well Back 9th September Of Poles and Twiglets August 2006 25th August Free Fares For the Fat and the Fashionable 11th August London Friendly 4th August Archway To Organic Heaven July 2006 21st July London - Celebrity Frat House 7th July Out of the Galleries into the Streets June 2006 23rd June Mayors, Nightmares and Marias 16th June Downright Rude in Paris and London 9th June Enter the Inferno May 2006 26th May Curvaceous Border 12th May Vegging Out April 2006 21st April The Camden Crawl 17th April Down the Pan 13th April I Want to Break Free 9th April Big Brother seems to have been left in a bar somewhere 7th April Don't Box Me In March 2006 24th March Political Correctness Reaches New Heights February 2006 24th February A Stadium's Tale: Cup Final Goes West 17th February Modern Musicals are Rubbish 10th February The City-Side Alliance January 2006 20th January February Sales 20th January Moby Sick 13th January Glass Half Full 3rd January Three Cheers for the Tube Station Workers December 2005 22nd December January Bites 16th December A Remarkable Year November 2005 25th November And a Partridge in a JCB 11th November Driving Miss Sadie 4th November Spam, Spam, Spammity-Spam, Shakespeare, Zorro, Chico and Rasputin October 2005 28th October Trick or Treat? 21st October We Don't Mind a Little Delay... 14th October Final Resting Place for Young British Artists September 2005 16th September Just a small urn for me, please barman 9th September DRINK! DRINK! DRINK! 2nd September The Free Tenor August 2005 30th August Samba Rhythms Breaking Out All Over The Stadium 20th August Getting Behind the Iron Farce 10th August Mystery Play is No Sell Out July 2005 29th July Moving On From 7/7 22nd July Get loaded in the park 15th July Victoire!!